I'm Not Alone.
Several years ago, I walked into a room--burnt out from life, raw with emotion, and consumed with guilt for feeling that way because I had everything I could ever want. I wasn't sure if I was even an alcoholic, but I figured it couldn't hurt to try and stop drinking because the booze and pills certainly weren't making life better.
In that first AA meeting, I expected to see people on their last legs of existence. I prepared for the image of scruffy, unwashed, television-created addicts. Instead, I found doctors, lawyers, stay-at-home moms, and people who very well could have been sitting next to me in church last Sunday.
When I heard them speak, I came to know two things with crystal clear clarity: 1) I am an alcoholic, and 2) I'm not alone. In fact, not only am I not alone--I'm in incredibly awesome company.
I started this site as a way to try and destigmatize addiction, help non-alcoholics understand what goes on in the head of an addict, and help other alcoholics and addicts to feel less alone. And, in the interest of total transparency, it's cathartic for me.
But my journey hasn't just been about not drinking or drugging. It's been about having my heart split wide open for people who haven't lived with the privileges I have. Whose struggles have been different than mine, and haven't had an entire community--much less, an entire country--rooting for them to succeed.
In my essays, I share my anger, fear, sadness, guilt, and just about every emotion imaginable. You may not agree with me, but know that my words are from my heart and they are as honest and transparent as I know how to be.